How the fuck do I get a job in finance?

I have a chemistry degree from a decent university. Like tier 2 maybe. I work in IT.

I need to get a finance job, I can't take this shit any more. I'm tired of wallowing in wagiedom while some wall street jerk off makes 500k/yr. What the fuck does he have that I don't? I should be that guy.

It's this or selling meth. Or other acts of which I will not speak.

What the fuck does he have that I don't?

Money.

no shit retard

You asked.

sir please do the needful

your dad
those jobs are almost entirely rich people trying to employ their kids. you have to have a degree in a dubious "science" though for it to not be blatant nepotism.

these fuckers work like 80-100 hours per week and are constantly stressed out and on cocaine. none of them can keep this shit up for more than just a few years at best. after that they are mentally burned out (for life). is that what you want?

You’re hosed if you didn’t intern there first or have relatable experience. Most full-time analysts interned in Investment Banking or Sales & Trading at a bank.

Also, even if you do get an internship but don’t get a return offer you’ll get treated like a leper by other banks. If you’re a pro at financial modeling you might still get looks for IB roles, for trading it seems like a lot want you to be a wiz in SQL/Python/VBA.

Wow just like any job with added bonus of extra pay

Unfortunately my dad isn't the CEO of a hedge fund. My uncle worked in finance but he's been retired since forever.

Well I didn't intern anywhere so I guess I'm hosed.

If you’re a pro at financial modeling you might still get looks for IB roles, for trading it seems like a lot want you to be a wiz in SQL/Python/VBA.

I can spend a year or two to grind out whatever I need to grind out, but I have to know that it will be relevant and marketable. Like, say I get really good at financial modeling. How do I prove that and not just get my application tossed before anyone even sees it?

you think that position is enviable?
do you have any idea how brutal the cutting is for those jobs, there is constant threat of getting taken behind the barn and then its game over for your career
the only thing you should focus on is getting something you own yourself either a business or hard assets
and either can be done best away from hcol places that offer those job types

WAHHH WAHHH I HAVE TO WORK 80 HOURS A WEEK AND I ONLY GET PAID 250K STARTING AND I MIGHT LOSE MY (250k/yr base pay) JOB AND HAVE TO GET A NORMAL JOB

shut up bitchnugget I don't care
I can do it

muh hcol

If you are working 80 hours a week, you don't need a fancy apartment or a nice car. Rent a hovel with 5 roommates. You will be sleeping in the office half the time anyways, who cares.

I knew 2 guys that worked in IT and got jobs in IT at Goldman Sachs. They both wanted to cross over to the promise land and become Patrick Batemans. Who doesn't?

One of them got married and had his wife start shitting out lots of children. He got fired in 2010 and had to take a different IT job in the suburbs.

One of them kept his nose to the grindstone and kept working hard. Passed all 3 levels of the CFA. Had zero life outside of work, Legend is that he made it, but nobody knows for sure. Nobody has heard from him in years.

Careful what you wish for, fren.
You just might get it.

Yeah pretty much, my career is comfy but seems really capped if I don’t get a CFA. Also most of the rich portfolio managers I know are PhD’s too, seems like it’s pretty much just fucking over if your parents didn’t explicitly force you to live and breath finance or you’re not rich enough to buy your way in.

like the other anon said i hope you get exactly what you wish for anon

it isnt like its 2025 right now and there exist so many online places where you can get detailed accounts of what a street job is like and what is needed to get in and to stay in
or to see the graveyards of people it ate up and shatted out
i'll say again jobs are worthless, get something you actually own and cant be taken away from you on a boomers whim

Who cares if I burn out or get fired. I can just go into another field, except I'll be several hundred thousand dollars richer.

fuck it, start your own firm, that's what I'm doing

OP is forexanon/lebanon btw he's a massive scamming faggot who spams these shitty threads

meds

Brownfield Capital from The Big Short started with 100k and turned it into 30m. They bought LEAPs in companies with negative news but didn't affect the revenue so the stock would recover in a years time.
Crowdstrike last year was a great example, they were the source for mass blackout in millions of computers affecting their share price but in a year they recovered.

Know someone.

Finance is a bunch of bros hanging out. Did you do crew or lacrosse in college? Are you a bad enough dude? Is there anything about you that makes you cool? Make some friends in finance, show you can do a good job. Only minorities, queers and alphadorks get in through the regular lane

I don't know about investment banking or the buy/sell side, but if you want to get into wealth management it's pretty easy

get entry level role at broker (some don't even require degree)

get experience and your licenses

be likeable

get promoted to an intermediate consultant role

work another year or two

get promoted to adviser

There you go, they give you your own book too, you're now making 140k easy even if you're just meh at the job

I heard CFI's courses are pretty good, but you can also do Wall Street Prep, Training the Street, or Breaking into Wall St's modeling courses then post the the cert on LinkedIn. If you get an interview, they'll probably ask you to run them through a DCF, then if you pass you're likely going to do a modeling test or case study.

If you went to a decent school, you can also hit up alumni on LinkedIn in the role/company you want and pick their brains. I'd go with an agenda though, and have some decent questions already written out vs. asking them to give you a general run down.

>be likeable

It's over.

You need to suck off the right guy's cock. Become the lover of a rich banker and ask him for a job.
t. knower

Quality post. Very rare around these parts

I have some capital but attempting a move like this and losing it all would kill me.

uncle worked in finance

"hOw dO i GEt iN"